Sunday, June 29, 2008

Forget the iPhone, I Want One of These



Programmers vs. the Universe

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.
~Rich Cook

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

It's Never Simple...Really

When we moved in to this house, the "closet" where our washer and dryer were had a large opening covered by doors that had a track at the top and a track at the bottom. When you opened them, they formed a "V"...that is, until they fell out of their track and hit you in the head as soon as you turned your back! I finally got tired of putting it back on the track so, with my Dad's help, I replaced the door with the type of door shown here. That was last year.

This year, the same thing began happening with the doors on our bedroom closet (same type we had in front of the dryer). The one door finally needed to be glued, but before I could glue it, Brooke told me I needed to replace it with doors like we have in front of our washer and dryer. Thus, my home improvement project was born.

One would think installing these doors would not be all that difficult or take longer than an hour...especially for someone who has installed them before. Here's the highlights of my one-on-one time with the closet tonight:

  • 7:30pm - Head to Home Depot. Find door, purchase and come home.
  • Take old door down. Remove tracks.
  • Unpack door and ask self, "Where's the other half?"
  • Answer self, "Still at Home Depot in the box. They sell each door separately, dummy!"
  • Call Dad and tell him the story of typical Hurt "luck" when working on a home project. Bummed because Home Depot just closed and I wanted this project done tonight.
  • Find out that Home Depot is open until 10pm. Go back to Home Depot.
  • Find second door, walk it from back of store to the front, wait my turn in line at the register, find bar code for clerk and notice door is damaged.
  • Go back to door section of store.
  • Discover there are no more doors the color of the one I just bought.
  • Make frantic phone calls to Brooke, ask Home Depot if another store has the color I need, decide to buy different color doors after talking to Brooke.
  • Buy TWO doors this time. (Mental note to self...go BACK to Home Depot tomorrow to return door not used).
  • Come back home and bring doors into house
  • Take direction booklet and look for three minutes trying to find where it is written in English.
  • English directions do not make sense. Read in Spanish. No help!
  • Look at pictures, read directions in French. No help!
  • Go to church, get drill.
  • Look at pictures again.
  • Go to church, get jig saw.
  • Look at pictures again. Lay out pieces. Realize saw is not needed.
  • Put up top rail. Hang doors.
  • Put up side rail on both sides.
  • Side rails??? How does this work?
  • Look at pictures, read directions in English, Spanish and French. No help!
  • Remove "side rails" and hide under bed. Install side clips.
  • Install handles (without looking at the directions OR the pictures...pat self on back)
  • 11:30pm. Finished already.
So, my one hour project turned into four and technically I'm not done until I return the unused door tomorrow. It's never simple...really.

Monday, June 23, 2008

This Century's Salem Witch Trials

"The heads of major fossil-fuel companies who spread disinformation about global warming should be "tried for high crimes against humanity and nature," according to a leading climate scientist."

More and more scientists are finding man-made "global warming" to be a crock, and now we have this? This is nothing more than a modern-day witch hunt. Read it all here (if you can stomach it).

Walking Like a Cowboy

I know I don't look like much of a cowboy...especially with the tennis shoes and all. But I think I might be walkin' like one today. I went to visit my friend Stan King and his family this weekend, and he took me on a 2 hour trail ride Saturday with some people from his church. Stan called me yesterday and asked if I was sore. I told him, surprising, not really. That was yesterday. Today, I still don't look like a cowboy, but I may be walking a bit more bow legged as muscles on the inside of my legs are telling me I rode a horse for two hours!

I will post pictures of the hog we butchered, cooked and ate when I get those, but I had a great time. It's always good to get to hang out with Stan, and the trail ride was a real bonus. When I was in high school and college, my family lived in the country and had horses. It's been about 18 years since I've ridden and it was a blast.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

The Correct Way to Weigh

I posted this for many of you, who like me, have been doing it wrong all these years.
Thank you to Deborah Brown for passing along this important medical information.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Pride Is Assumed When You Say You're a Texan

Have you ever looked at a map of the world?

Look at Texas with me just for a second.

That picture, with the Panhandle and the Gulf Coast, and the Red River and the Rio Grande is as much a part of you as anything ever will be. As soon as anyone anywhere in the world looks at it they know what it is. It's Texas. Pick any kid off the street in Japan and draw him a picture of Texas in the dirt and he'll know what it is. What happens if I show you a picture of any other state? You might get it maybe after a second or two, but who else would? And even if you do, does it ever stir any feelings in you?

In every man, woman and child on this planet, there is a person who wishes just once he could be a real live Texan and get up on a horse or ride off in a pickup. There is a little bit of Texas in everyone.

Did you ever hear anyone in a bar go, 'Wow...so you're from Iowa ? Cool, tell me about it?' Do you know why? Because no one cares about Iowa.

Texas is the Alamo. Texas is 183 men standing in a church, facing thousands of Mexican nationals, fighting for freedom, who had the chance to walk out and save themselves, but stayed instead to fight and die for the cause of freedom.

We send our kids to schools named William B. Travis and James Bowie and Crockett, and do you know why? Because those men saw a line in the sand and they decided to cross it and be heroes.

John Wayne paid to do the movie himself. That is the Spirit of Texas.

Texas is Sam Houston capturing Santa Anna at San Jacinto.

Texas is huge forests of Piney Woods like the Davy Crockett National Forest.

Texas is breathtaking mountains in the Big Bend.

Texas is the unparalleled beauty of bluebonnet fields in the Texas Hill Country.

Texas is the beautiful, warm beaches of the Gulf Coast of South Texas.

Texas is the shiny skyscrapers in Houston and Dallas.

Texas is world record bass from places like Lake Fork.

Texas is Mexican food like nowhere else, not even Mexico.

Texas is the Fort Worth Stockyards, Bass Hall, the Ballpark in Arlington and
the Astrodome. (guess now the Reliant Stadium too)

Texas is larger-than-life legends like Michael DeBakey, Denton Cooley, Willie Nelson, Buddy Holly, Gene Autry, Audie Murphy, Tommy Lee Jones, Waylon Jennings, Janis Joplin, Kris Kristofferson, Tom Landry, Darrell Royal, ZZ Top, Eric Dickerson, Earl Campbell, Nolan Ryan, Sam Rayburn, Howard Hughes, George H. W.Bush, Lyndon B. Johnson, and George W. Bush. and let's not forget GEORGE STRAIT

Texas is great companies like Dell Computer, Texas Instruments and Compaq, Bell Helicopter And LOCKHEED MARTIN AEROSPACE, Home of the F-16 Jet Fighter and the JSF Fighter.

Texas is NASA.

Texas is huge herds of cattle and miles of crops.

Texas is home to the most amazing sunsets of gold over an empty field.

Texans have pride like no others.

Texas is hundreds of deer running around neighborhoods and fields.

Texas is skies blackened with doves, and fields full of deer.

Texas is a place where towns and cities shut down to watch the local high school football game on Friday nights, and for a Night In Old San Antonio River Parade in San Antonio.

To drive across Texas is to drive 1/4 the way across the United States.

Texas is ocean beaches, deserts, lakes and rivers, mountains and prairies, and modern cities.

Everything's bigger in Texas !

No one does anything bigger or better than it's done in Texas.

By federal law, Texas is the only state in the U.S. that can fly its flag at the same height as the U.S. flag. Think about that for a second. You fly the Stars and Stripes at 20 feet in Maryland, California, or Maine , and your state flag, whatever it is, goes at 17 feet. You fly the Stars and Stripes in front of the high school or anyplace else at 20 feet, the Lone Star flies at the same height - 20 feet. Do you know why? Because it is the only state that was a Republic before it became a state.

Also, being a Texan is as high as being an American down here. Our capitol is the only one in the country that is taller than the capitol building in Washington, D.C. and we can divide our state into five states at any time if we wanted to! We included these things as part of the deal when we came on. That's the best part, right there.

Texas even has its own power grid!! ... Did I mention Live music capitol of the world?

If it isn't in Texas, you probably don't need it.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Day One

Well, the Fam left for Alabama today. I am VERY PROUD of my wife...she's been invited to do the children's portion of Hartselle Camp Meeting this year. She and Amanda left on a plane today, a bit late, but they finally got off. They were supposed to be at the airport for an 11:30am flight. Due to the weird storm we had blow in, they didn't get to leave until 2:45pm! But they are there now and I am home...alone!

So tonight I had two options: sit around and mope, or find something fun to do. I chose the latter, grabbed my GPS and Pocket PC, hopped on the motorcycle and went geocaching at a local preserve. The storm thing today (that's what I call it...it was really odd) cooled things off a bit, so I thought it would be a good night to try and find the 10 geoaches hidden in the preserve. I found nine of them but ran out of sunlight before I could find #10...very frustrating!

Here's a few pictures from my adventures this evening:

Can you see something inside that little tube? It's a geocache!


And here it is in my had. It is a pill bottle glued into that tube. Can you see the lid at the top of the container?

This is one of the most clever hides I have seen in a while. The name of the cache was "Flat Tired". I looked and looked through all the trash dumped in this area, all the while thinking the about the name of the cache. Just when I was about to give up (after looking over all three tires in this trash pile), I looked at this one once more. Do you see anything out of place? How about the valve stem coming out of the tire? Yep, the log you sign is inside that. It was a little harder to find though because it was dark. The flash on my camera makes it a little easier to see. Very clever!

I Might Help Set a World Record Today

If you use Firefox browser, you can download version 3 today after 10am PT and be a part of Firefox's attempt to set a Guinness Book of World Records attempt for the most downloads in a 24 hour period (click the picture above for all the details). I'm one of 1.5 million people who have signed up saying they would download today. Come join us!

Here is the download link. Right now, it is still for version 2, but I believe they will change it after 10am PT...if not, you will be able to find the link from here.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

A Great Father's Day

My wife and daughter made me feel very special today and I had a great Father's Day. Amanda got me a card that read, "Dad, it's Father's Day and you deserve the best the world has to offer... (open card) That's why you have me! Happy Father's Day from your daughter." Along with that came a sun catcher car that she made during VBS this week AND the children's church craft from today.

Sometime this week, Brooke and Amanda went shopping and bought me a black t-shirt that says, Born to Ride, Forced to Work with a motorcycle on the front. They also found the sound track to Dan in Real Life which I have been wanting. And then Brooke just happened to find a new Chris Botti CD which she calls romantic music (woo hoo!).

After church, we went to Cedar Hill state park where my parents are camping and wished my Dad a Happy Father's Day. While we were there, Dad took a picture of me with my best friend.



Earlier this week, one of the guys from church said something about going on a motorcycle ride today. I didn't hear back from anybody, so I figured Father's Day nixed those plans. But hey, we're fathers, right? It is our day. The four of us pictured here ended up spending time with our families this afternoon and then went for an evening ride (read "man time"). It was a lot of fun. (By the way, if you're wondering what I would look like if I were totally bald, the shadow cast by the sun here gives you a glimpse!)

I am thankful to have a wife and daughter who take such good care of me, put up with me and work so hard to make me feel special. I had a great day. Thank you Brooke and Amanda!

Friday, June 13, 2008

Prepare Thyself, Amateur

So I turn on my cell phone this morning (true story). I immediately hear the tones that tell me I have two text messages. I open the first one, from one of the youth workers at our church, and it says:

prepare for the worst

Well, one of our church youth has been telling me all week that he is going to "get me" at VBS today (water balloons, hose or something along those lines). I figured he had enlisted this youth worker's help to harass me. I thought the other text was going to be from youth member saying the same thing.

So, I replied appropriately:

Prepare Thyself, Amateur

After sending that text, I opened the other one that came in. Come to find out, this one was from the youth worker, too. This one said:

I know u r sleeping, but please pray for us. Our dog has been sick and is probably going to die. We will probably have to...
(and the text cut off there)

It only took a second or two to realize what the ... at the end meant. This text was too long to come in one message, so it was continued as a second message. The entire message would have read:

I know u r sleeping, but please pray for us. Our dog has been sick and is probably going to die. We will probably have to prepare for the worst.

To which, I had already replied, "Prepare Thyself, Amateur"

So of course I had to text her and explain my moronic reply.

Just call me Mr. Sensitive.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Solution to the Oil Crisis

OPEC sells oil for $128.00 a barrel.
OPEC nations buy U.S. grain at $7.00 a bushel.
Solution: Sell grain for $128.00 a bushel.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Send Your Friends a Post-Rapture Email!

I saw the headline for this as I was browsing through Google Reader tonight. Somehow I'm thinking Jesus expects a little more of us than this. How can we expect the lost not to laugh at us? I did when I read this.

A new Web site is offering a miraculous service — e-mails sent to loved ones left behind on Earth after you've been swept up to heaven in the Rapture...

Final e-mails from vanished subscribers will be triggered when three of the site's five Christian staffers fail to log in for six days in a row.

Brought to you by "YouveBeenLeftBehind.com" (seriously!)

Read the entire Fox News story here.

Monday, June 02, 2008

Not a Sound

Every once-in-a-while I will see a small owl sitting on our back yard fence when I let the dogs out at night. Tonight I saw two of them sitting on the sidewalk/ramp rail at church when I was doing my security walk. When I saw them, I stopped to watch them and they seemed to watch me, too. Finally I walked up for a closer view and one of them let me get within 6 feet before he took off. It wasn't until a few seconds later that I noticed what I had just missed...sound. When they flew, there was absolutely no sound, and one of them flew just 3-4 feet over my head.

I checked another couple doors and then walked back under the tree where I thought one of them had landed. Sure enough, there he was looking at me again. We watched each other for a while, me staring up, him making little triangle movements with his head staring down at me. To my surprise, he jumped/flew to a branch closer to me, and finally made his way to a branch straight over my head. He was definitely a very curious little owl.

Finally he hopped to another branch and looked out toward the playground area where the second owl had flown. When I stepped around to get a better view, he took off for the trees in the playground and was gone. Again, not a sound.