You Might Be a Redneck If...

You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God.'

You might be a redneck if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

You might be a redneck if: You still say ' Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'

You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.

You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.

You might be a redneck if: You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.

You might be a redneck if: You've never burned an American flag, nor intend to.

You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.

You might be a redneck if: You'd give your last dollar to a friend.

Rob's new Toy

Twitter Update From Wilbur

Made Me Laugh

God said, "Adam, I want you to do something for Me."

Adam said, "Gladly ,Lord, what do You want me to do?"

God said, "Go down into that valley."

Adam said, "What's a valley?"

God explained it to him. Then God said, "Cross the river."

Adam said, "What's a river?"

God explained that to him, and then said, "Go over to the hill...."

Adam said, "What is a hill?"

So, God explained to Adam what a hill was. He told Adam, "On the other side of the hill you will find a cave."

Adam said, 'What's a cave?'

After God explained, He said, "In the cave you will find a woman."

Adam said, "What's a woman?'

So God explained that to him, too. Then, God said, 'I want you to reproduce."

Adam said, "How do I do that?"

God first said (under His breath), "Really?" And then, just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.

So, Adam goes down into the valley, across the river, and over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman.

Then, in about five minutes, he was back.

God, His patience wearing thin, said angrily, "What is it now?"

And Adam said....

"What's a headache?"

US Capitol Tour With David Barton

Pick Up, Amanda!

I was at work today and Amanda called me on Skype (we live in the church parsonage so she was literally next door, we have no home phone, Amanda's cell phone is pre-paid and so Skype is cheaper).

"Dad, did you just call me on your old cell phone?"

"No, sweetheart. I did not call. The phone is turned off and nobody can call it."

"But Dad, it rang twice. There was a message that said, 'Pick up, Amanda'. I thought you were trying to call me."

"Amanda, the phone was turned off when I got my new cell phone. Nobody can call."

"Dad! There were two messages that said, 'Pick up, Amanda.' One was from yesterday and one was from today."

"Amanda, I use the checkbook on that phone and it automatically updates my calendar. Maybe you were seeing some kind of calendar reminder."

"No, Dad! It was a message that said, 'Pick up, Amanda'" (Amanda was pretty freaked out by the personal nature of the message to her, and the more I told her it was not me, the more worried she became).

Finally, the light dawned on me. "Oh, Amanda. Sweetheart, I put "Pick Up Amanda" on my calendar for yesterday and today because Mommy was out of town and I was picking you up from school. Those were calendar reminders that I had set up for the "Pick Up Amanda" events on my calendar!"